Guilt

message: Please do not blame yourself, we have all felt if only, I offered my young son calpol the first night he told me his eye felt sore, told him to go back to bed as I did not want him to have time off school after the xmas holidays. Everyday I looked at his little face swelling up I trusted the what the prefessionals told me. I have done the same as you, I have looked at photos of him the week before (xmas) and asked myself why did I not know, not see, or notice, but my god did we really think it would be a cancer? No, you are being amother now to your son, lots of time love and alot of caring and you will get through this, please do not beat yourself up your boy needs you. take care gracie.

message: aysepie,

So very sorry to hear about your son and also so sorry to hear about your guilt. I can, hand on heart, say that I know how you feel. I wished I'd also not listened to the nurse at the walk-in centre who said our son had conjunctivitis - and yet he had alveolar parameningeal rhabdomyosarcoma (with 50% cure rate).

The guilt does lessen, although your guilt will feel raw for a while to come I am sure. You and your family are having to deal with the diagnosis right now and if your experience is anything like ours, we lived in the cancer bubble until recently - and even now, life is always tarnished by our son's diagnosis.

Telling you to please take it easy on yourself is pointless as your his mum and of course, you will blame yourself. That's what we do!

I do wish you, your son and family all the very best and hope all goes well with you.

message: im realy sorry to read your story ,I to know how you feel in january this year my 12 year old daughter found out she had a brain tumor and i to ignored all the signs like headaches nd tiredness, her left side was slower and her vision was blurred i left it for months thinking she had just started secondry school i also even thought she might have been taking drugs.I felt realy guilty when i took her to the optians because of her eye turning inwards and he sent us straight to the hospital .I was told if i had left it 2 more weeks she would have been blind and paralised down her left side. GUILT wasnt the word .she still has some cancer but it is controlable and it will never kill her but i always sit and think what if i had left it and how much of a bad mum i was for not knowing she was so ill but she dosent and tells me to stop being daft typical teenager lol keep smilimg guilt dosent help anyone

message: hi my 10 year old son was diagnosed with Glioblastoma brain tumour, i understand your pain as my son was sick and asleep for 2 weeks before we found out what was wrong, 4 doctors come out and did not see this till i had enough and took him to hospital, i feel guilt every day and never thought i was a good mum before but we was, were only human, and i think every one goes threw this guilt is not your fault, and im sure you done every think you could of, you have just got to remember here and now is what matters i try to keep my son as happy as i can, that's all you can do, you thinking like that is not going to help. you need to be positive and happy with him. god luck..

message: My son was 8 and had been complaining of a sore neck at first , i thought it must be how he is sleeping but after a week of complaining and yes I feel guilt for telling him he should use his pillows, I noticed he really was tiered also , so i took him to my g,p and was told he must be grinding his teeth !!!, watched him get iller went back two days later .. oh its an infection .. took the antibiotics ..two days later watched them spurt out his nose and that is when I went to local hospital ..who sent me on to get a cat scan for him in another hospital but they felt it was just a viral infection and if i felt it was more serious i could come to clinic in 6 days .. six days my son kept suffering six days were i should have shouted NO ..something is up as in my heart i knew. a week later we were off to another hospital for a biopsy which confirmed alveolar rhabdomyosarcoma nasoparamengeal ., he went through 6 months intensive treatment , then maintenance and i s till wont forgive myself that time i thought , stop moaning and go to bed or did not turn away and come back 6 days later, because he would have been in pain. He is doing well right now but , it never leaves you and you feel; guilt if you even do not fully investigate a cough .